Well, almost. In June I turn the big three zero.. and here’s how I feel about it.
Here’s to Thirty
I’m not going to lie, turning thirty is a big deal. Infact, I can’t actually believe that in June I will be entering my thirties and I don’t really know how I’m meant to feel about it. My twenties has been a mix of amazing (meeting and marrying Chris) and not so amazing. Whilst I’m definitely happy to leave some things from my twenties firmly in the past, I can feel my self emotionally clinging onto my youth, with both hands and feet… and anything else I can grab it with.
You see, growing up thirty has always seemed old to me (I’m sorry to any 30+’s) and whenever I pictured myself being thirty, I kind of imagined I’d have it all figured out. The truth is I’ve only really just started figuring it out and even then I feel I still have a long way to go before my knowledge is up to scratch, on any matter. I’m almost thirty but I’m not old enough to be almost thirty! I guess what I’m trying to say here is that when people say they “still feel 21”, I actually DO still feel 21. I feel like some mean person has popped my body and birthdate into a time machine and whizzed me forward a few years. I’m just not meant to be thirty yet. I remember feeling a similar way when I turned twenty. Leaving my teenage years was almost like jumping ship into a sea of sharks – some of my friends had already done it and now it was my turn to face the music. Luckily it went okay, I survived… so here’s to hoping it all goes well this time around too.
It’s not always negative, don’t get me wrong. When I’ve got my game face on, I enjoy being older. I remember the times I couldn’t drive, earn my own money or order a Chinese takeaway two nights in a row (mwhaha) I realise how much wiser I am now – I can spot peoples BS a mile off these days and I know to always pick food from the back in a Supermarket. Sometimes I can even tell which way the stranger walking towards me is going to turn, just by their facial expressions. I mean come on, I can even parallel park my own freakin’ car! It’s these days I enjoy being able to live life as a grown up (Disclaimer: feelings mostly appear after drinking 2 x glasses of wine on a Friday evening)
Rather than dread it, feel worried and concerned about my impending level up, I have decided to ignore it and run away. HA, I joke. But seriously, I’m trying my best to embrace it. Many people that have made it through their thirties tell me it was the best age to be, so I’m hoping for a five star rating on my time in the club.
All in all, I guess it’s another era of the unknown.What will thirty bring me? Hopefully happiness, health and no stinking hangovers.
Thanks to Debs for taking the snaps!
I can definitely relate to this post! I’m turning 30 in October and seem to flip from being completely terrified about it to kind of looking forward to it. My twenties haven’t been great unfortunately for a number of reasons, so part of me is quite keen to leave them behind and maybe start again. But I also feel sad to be getting older because I’m nowhere near where I wanted to be at this age. I’m eternally single, don’t have any children and still live with my parents, and that feels kind of crap. But I’m hoping that 30 will be the start of something good, and I hope it will be a good decade for you too 🙂
Jenny xx
http://www.jaffacat.co.uk